March 21, 2021
TW: Childhood trauma, SA, SH, Diet Culture.
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Good morning my friends! Today I am going to guide you through a subject that many of you may not have heard of before. This is something that is growing in popularity within the spiritual community and has been on my mind a lot. Sometimes I feel a call for a certain topic and can’t shake the feeling that someone needs to hear about it. Luckily for all of you, I have a blog and not a megaphone. Healing your inner child is a term commonly used in therapeutic sessions. The truth is, every single thing that you are, do, and feel stems back to your childhood. Yes, even if you had an amazing childhood. There is some aspect of nature vs. nurture but we are going to simplify this to understand the basics first. This article will most likely have a part 2 (or more) so remember to subscribe to my emails so you never miss an article! As always, I am not a professional or licensed psychologist. I am simply using my life experiences and personal growth. If there is anything you have questions on after reading, feel free to send me an email.
Healing your inner child can be a lot to take in. Like I mentioned, even if you had the perfect childhood, chances are that you still have some healing to do. Even more so if you struggle with mental illness. There are lots of reasons our inner child may be hurting. Sometimes it can be a case of not having your emotional needs met and other times, abuse and trauma. No matter what you went through, this may be a hard exercise for you. I will be dropping some YouTube links in the notes section to accompany the exercises I will be suggesting. Healing isn’t linear. You WILL have days where it feels like you are regressing. This is perfectly normal and do not beat yourself up about it! Healing truly never ends, either. So please don’t be frustrated with yourself or others while taking on this process. The goal is to look inside of yourself to figure out the “why.” There won’t always be a “why” however once you learn to properly feel your emotions and process your thoughts, you will be one step closer to accepting inner peace. In Laymen’s terms, every single person has experienced a lack of understanding at some point in their childhood. Lots of factors can play into this including but not limited to: self esteem issues, communication troubles, self harm (mild or extreme – both are valid), abuse, childhood depression, isolation, proper nutrition. The list could go on forever. Literally. What I’m trying to say here is do not feel like there is something wrong with you if you had the “perfect” childhood. You feel the way that you do for a reason. Your feelings are real and valid. Never feel bad about having them.
“Where do I start?”
For a lot of us, our childhood persona feels like a different person. This is even truer if you struggle with dissociation (like me). There is one exercise that I recommend you do to begin. This is a form of visualization, so you will have an advantage if you meditate already. If not, don’t worry I have tips for that too. I want to warn you: THIS CAN TRIGGER BIG EMOTIONS. Don’t be worried going into this, but be prepared to cry. To begin, we are going to sit in a quiet room. Find the comfiest, coziest spot. The goal here is to feel safe without distractions. Start with at least three deep breaths, the kind that fill your lungs and expand your stomach. In through the nose and out from the mouth. Next, I want you to really feel the surface below you. That soft chair, the warm socks, gravity keeping you firmly planted in place. Once you are in this headspace, I want you to picture yourself as a child. Visualize your looks, your face, arms, legs, and clothes. Braces, glasses, a cast, whatever it is that you remember.
Think of your childhood bedroom. Your toys, what kind of bed you had, the sun shining through the windows. I want you to walk into that room and introduce yourself to that child. Hug them, and most importantly, tell them what they needed to hear. “You are strong, you are brave, you are good enough, you are not broken, everything will be okay.” Hold yourself for as long as you’d like. Feel the overpowering emotions that is beginning the healing process. Spend some time together, maybe you remember a favorite stuffed animal. Your inner child would love to play with you, because I’m betting they’re feeling a little bit lonely. Do you remember that feeling? Sit with it, feel it. When you’re ready, say “see you soon” and come back to the room you’re sitting in. Now that our “introduction” is complete, healing can begin.
The most crucial aspect to healing is forgiveness. Forgive those who caused you harm. Let go of the demons you’ve been carrying all throughout your adult life. Set them free. You are safe, you are loved, and you are YOU. Nobody else is you, isn’t that so wonderful? Chances are, there are things you loved to do as a child that you have long since given up. Mine was art. Yours may be singing, playing music, dancing, reading, playing outside, any number of things. I want you to pick one and try it out. This is one of the best ways to reconnect with your inner child and remind them, you, that they’re not alone. The next steps are up to you. It is important to visualize what could be causing a mental block in your adult life. And sometimes, there won’t be an answer. The most important thing is you did it. You took the first step along the path of inner peace. I’m proud of you. Your inner child is too. They would love you.
Thanks for reading, Friends! Below are some meditation videos that I have found helpful for beginners.
This week’s resources:
Veronica – Weekly Wellness